There is poetry in comic book scriptwriting, and as comic book audiences have grown older and more discerning, that poetry has become far less absurd.
This quote from Batman, considering his friend and colleague, Superman is a good measure of where comic books are today (the good ones anyway); “It is a remarkable dichotomy. In many ways, Clark is the most human of us all. Then… he shoots fire from the skies, and it is difficult not to think of him as a god. And how fortunate we all are that it does not occur to him.”– Batman
Even the old ones had some shining moments, though; "Are arbitrary labels more important than the way we live our lives, what we're supposed to be more important than what we actually are?" – Cyclops from the X-Men
Comic book wisdom was and remains a constant in my life. The writers are underrated, the artists overly talented and, one might even say that they themselves are heroes; they certainly are to me.
"Insanity is defined by its cultural milieu." – Man-Thing
Times have changed. In the early half of the 20th century, pre-XBox, the top selling comic titles would sell in the millions. Now top selling titles sell perhaps a couple of hundred thousand. I don’t think it’s a dying medium by any means but it has become far more “niche”. There’s too much media out there for comics to be as popular as they once were. Nonetheless, comics as a medium is something I’m likely to remain loyal to as long as I live; however, as once written by comics legend Len Wein in closing to a rather dramatic chapter of the Incredible Hulk in the 1970s, “Only the sea, after all, is eternal”.
Because the audience has changed, the medium has evolved. I honestly think that people who don’t give comic books a chance are missing out on some amazing stories, special effects with no budgetary or three dimensional limitations and beautiful artwork, but I digress.
"The fates have smiled on you, Loki…they have provided you with yet another opportunity to slay me. You wanted me so desperately. Now you have me. Do your worst.” – Thor
Having made my brief stand for the merit of comics, I’d like to go back to a somewhat more absurd facet of the medium – classic comic book dialogue.
“Before this day is ended, mankind shall grovel helplessly at my feet -- and, as fate has obviously ordained – Doctor Doom shall be Master of Earth!” – Doctor Doom
The comics I read growing up were largely of the “Bronze Age” era.
“The Bronze Age of Comic Books is an informal name for a period in the history of mainstream American comic books usually said to run from 1970 to 1985. It follows the Silver Age of Comic Books.” – Wikipedia
I would feast on such titles as Batman, Justice League of America, the Amazing Spider-Man, the Avengers, Superman, Action Comics, Wonder Woman and many more. Best of all, I could pick up these gems at the café down the street for a mere 50c each.
One of the most exciting things for me was always the supervillains. Their plots to overthrow (the World, Mankind, the hero of the story, etc etc) were elaborate, often nonsensical and always a riveting read.
“Servile dolt!” – Doctor Doom
The heroes always came out on top – not very “real world”, but that was just how it always worked in comics.
“A lone voice in the darkness can rouse many if not snuffed out.” – Despero
I started collecting comic books at the age of four, and I haven’t stopped since. I fell in love with the characters, the Machiavellian plots and the garish costumes, which worked really well on paper but would probably look utterly ludicrous in the real world.
Bronze age supervillains always had a fantastic turn of phrase. These were evil geniuses after all; one would expect their vocabularies to be above par. Not only would villains hatch their elaborate schemes in colourful ways, they would explain them to their protagonists in fiendish detail. They also seemed to think they were pretty funny back then, as most of what they said was punctuated by maniacal laughter (I shall destroy Gotham using my giant nose hair clipper, Batman and you and the Boy Wonder shall fall too!! HA HA HA HA HAAA!!!).
Some of the heroes had their moments too. Marvel Comics’ Thor, for example spoke the “Queen’s English” circa sixteen hundred and something (or thereabouts), even though he’s actually a Norse god of Germanic descent.
More to the point; I later entered the world of copywriting, and I honestly believe that I owe my “way with words” to the Bronze Age heroes and villains that shaped my vocabulary. Yes, supervillains and their heroic counterparts (to a lesser degree) taught me a lot of big words.
Whether it was Doctor Doom’s penchant to refer to himself in the third person, Thanos’s cosmic arrogance or the Joker’s twisted diatribes, I learned a little from all of them. They were a wonder to read and I often needed a dictionary handy to make head or tail of them.
Why be pretentious about it? I didn’t gain my vocabulary and writing skills from reading Dickens on the porch with a cup of tea in hand. Oscar Wilde, Dostoevsky and Tolstoy were writers I would only attempt to tackle much later, armed with my supervillain-like arsenal of verbosity and unnecessary exposition.
So parents, be warned; before you go saying things like “those things will rot your brain” to your kids, consider these words of wisdom from Thanos featured in an issue of Warlock from Marvel comics:
“(Truth) is a subjective concept, one to be accepted or rejected depending on the viewer’s prejudices.”
Comics may be mindless pulp to you, but for your child, they might just be a training ground for their future career.
So I would like to thank my teachers; the comic book writers who expanded my brain and made my internal monologues so much more grammatically correct. I will list a few names that stand out but these writers are by no means the only ones who inspired me to become a wordsmith:
Chris Claremont
Len Wein
Alan Moore
Frank Miller
Grant Morrison
Stan Lee
Neil Gaiman
John Byrne
Keith Giffen
JM DeMatteis
Marv Wolfman
Denny O’Neil
Alan Grant
Mike W Barr
Many have slipped my mind, I’m sure, but back then I often didn’t even notice who had written the tales I was taking in. The characters became so real to me that it almost seemed that they were writing themselves. I suppose that’s a compliment to the writers in a way, in that their scripts were just so gripping that I forgot about everything other than the story I was watching come to life.
I leave you with some final words of wisdom from the “funny books”:
“Paradise unearned is but a land of shadows” – the Silver Surfer
“Childhood is the interval between nothingness and disillusionment. An interval of innocence” – text caption from the Question #3 by Denny O’Neil
“… that is the decision all lovers must make – whether their relationship will destroy or heal the other. It’s often the most difficult decision they’ll have to make, and as love is not a constantly stable factor, it’s one they’ll have to make again and again.” – the Black Panther
“Your hunger for battle is a disease and the hammer of Thor shall supply the cure!” – Thor
“Those who do not share my vision will be crushed by it!” – Doctor Octopus
"Madness is the emergency exit. You can just step outside, and close the door on all those dreadful things that happened. You can lock them away... forever." – the Joker (Batman – the Killing Joke)
“April sweet is coming in, let the feast of fools begin!" – the Joker (Batman: Arkham Asylum)
Acknowledgement: part of the inspiration for this article came from a fantastic web page I found. Have a read through here:
http://www.pulpanddagger.com/maskedbookwyrm/saga/quotes.html
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